Jesus

It’s In The Bible

I am following the Bible-In-A-Year reading plan. Each day, there’s a section of the Old Testament, a section of the New Testament, a section of the Psalms, and a few verses from Proverbs. I like it a lot, and am mostly very faithful. When I am not, I never have an excuse. I missed yesterday. What was I doing? Nothing. I ate pizza, took a nap, watched the finale of a show called Extracted, and 2 game 7’s in the NBA playoffs. You can see how easy it was to forget, with all of this terribly important stuff going on. So, today I read 2 days worth, May 3 and May 4.

[Incidentally, today is May the 4th, which has been ridiculously christened Star Wars Day. I know this because 1. I love Star Wars, and 2. Because the man monitoring the self-check at my supermarket gave the super special greeting, “May the 4th be with you.”]

Yesterday’s Old Testament reading was from Judges, chapters 17 & 18, and was awfully strange…

A man named Micah stole a substantial amount of money from his mom. She didn’t know this, so she put a curse on whoever did it. When he became aware of this curse, he confessed and returned the money. She was happy, and, as you do, she took the money and had it cast into an idol (“in honor of [her] son” – it’s not stated what it looked like, but in my head, it was a silver bust of Micah. That sounds appropriate.) that Micah kept in his house. Then, a Levite (the Israelites tribe of priests) happened to be traveling by, and Micah asked him to live with him and become his personal priest, which he did. So, then, a group of Israelites from the tribe of Dan sent some scouts (who ended up at Micah’s house), who noticed the town of Laish (a fertile land inhabited by “peaceful and secure” people.) The Dan-ites took the advice of the scouts and decided to take that town. As they went, they passed by Micah’s house. These scouts told the rest of the idol & other valuable items, so they went into Micah’s house and took them. They also convinced the Levite to come with them and be their priest. The tribe of Dan took Laish with swords, burned the town to the ground, and renamed it Dan, where they set up Micahs idol to worship.

And there’s no more, chapter 19 just moves on to the next story. This is the entire story of Micah, Micah’s mom, their idol, Dan’s theft and subsequent destruction of “peaceful” Laish. I think there is value in every word of the Bible, even when we can’t immediately see it, that there’s layer after layer of wisdom to be discovered. I believe there is not a wasted word and nothing is in the Scriptures by accident or without purpose.

So, what about Judges 17 & 18? I think something should have gone wrong for Micah, who stole from his mother. But nothing did In fact, the opposite happened, there was blessing. They fashioned an idol? Why? Have you ever fashioned an idol? And, then something BIG and significant should have gone wrong for the Levite who monetized his priestly call to be someone’s personal priest, worshiping some random image, right? It should’ve gone wrong again, when the priest sold Micah out and moved on with the people who looted his house. But it sure didn’t. And Dan, one tribe of the 12 of God’s chosen people, who stole what may as well have been a golden calf, then destroyed a whole town of “peaceful” people, who didn’t do anything wrong except be peaceful – why wasn’t there consequence for them? This story isn’t supposed to end “happily ever after.”

This all makes me think of something my old pastor said. She asked the age-old question, if a tree falls in the forest and I’m not there to hear it, does it make a sound? “Of course it does!” The world doesn’t revolve around me, it continues to operate and trees continue to crash even if I’m not involved. She thought it was a terrific analogy to illustrate our limitless arrogance.

Does this passage truly not make sense simply because I can’t find sense in it? Of course not. Why would I get to decide what should be, or how things are supposed to go? Just because I’m selfish?

I really cannot find any meaning or purpose in it. It sounds all wrong to me. But I think I’m seeing what 1 word I’m missing: now. I can’t find meaning…now. It sounds wrong…now. How many passages and verses didn’t make sense to me the first time I read them? How many didn’t the 300th time? Jesus’ teaching on the “pearls to pigs” in the sermon on the mount is a perfect example. I thought it was impenetrable and silly, but it just turns out that I was. Now it’s thick with meaning and informs much of my behavior in relationships.

Maybe this story about Micah and his mom will be the same way. Or maybe it won’t. But today I had my eyes opened by this passage, and I didn’t so much like what I saw. I guess Micah isn’t the only one who struggles with idolatry.

Every week is the same. We show up for Sunday service, turn on the equipment (lights, sound board, speakers, microphones) and sit down to connect & pray until people begin to show up. We do what we do first, just in case there happens to be a problem, which is usually battery related. Last week’s problem was not battery related. We had a worship leader with a mask and an illness. We also had a projector that wouldn’t work.

[The end, so it’s on no one’s mind: It seems likely that the projector issue is an HDMI cord issue, which should be a very easy fix.]

This is certainly not the first headache with the equipment. Technology is awesome until it’s not. Our first Christmas Eve, I remember walking down the hill through the graveyard trying to remember to pray, but instead mostly talking to myself. Really? We have a big night, new people, and now this?!?!? Christmas Eve is like a super bowl for a local church. We sometimes have only one chance to make an impression, and that impression is less than great without sound for the music or the sermon. Once, we inexplicably lost power to the whole building for one day – the next time we turned on the lights, everything was as usual. A car tire rolled down our parking lot and crashed through our front doors, destroying them. In the middle of one message, a strange Russian man walked through our door and right down the aisle and started to preach and hand out tracts. Most winters I lose a lot of my voice for a week or 2. I could go on and on.

Much of the planning concerns removing any foreseeable obstacles. It’s difficult to connect when you’re cold or hot, when it’s noisy, when the speaker is unprepared and unclear, under or over dressed, the piano is out of tune, anything could happen, really. We’re very simple, not too many dogs or ponies in our show, but we still get hiccups. We control what we can and open our hands to allow the Spirit to work (or anything strange and surprising) inside of our careful preparation.

Sunday it was the projection and a sickness, and I do concede that it’s not ideal. It’s easy to become distracted and focus on what has gone wrong. But that morning, I just happened to be thinking about the many things we put before God (in other words, idolatry). And projection is just another one. We think we neeeeed projection and fancy light shows and microphones and snacks, but we don’t. All we need is the Gospel. Those other things can and do help us connect and communicate, but they are not the message. Not even close. When we allow them to cloud our vision, when they become the point, we have lost our way. And weeks like this provide the opportunity to remember.

This is true in our personal lives, just as well as in our community. We can put any number of relationships, possessions, opinions, beliefs, details and circumstances in a category we call essential, and before we are even aware, those things usurp the throne of our lives. Our partners, car, party, football team, or job title become the primary force that drive every step & decision. The water gets muddy as God is quickly downgraded, simply serving other neeeeeds. But once they are stripped away, once they fail, we can hopefully see the truth – there is only One need, only One essential, and He never fails.

[That’s the end, but I do want to tell you a funny story. We began the service with a similar message to this post – I encouraged us to not confuse the medium for the message, and remember that Jesus is our 1 and Only. As I walked out and the music started, I met someone new in our narthex. She lamented about how she was looking for a faith community, but so many were only the show. Some didn’t even mention the Name of Jesus, but their performance was on point, practiced and trendy. She was looking for Jesus and His Word. I laughed, said we didn’t even have any projection, but that she sure would hear about Jesus. Funny how things happen how and when they do.]

What About Joshua?

We’re currently at the tail end of Joshua, following a Bible In A Year plan, and there are some things about this book that are surprising and others that are problematic. I wonder if everyone everywhere who has ever read the Scriptures have had these same immediate reactions, if they thought, “sheesh, there is an awful lot of killing, so much about totally destroying entire groups of people,” or “why do I care about the boundaries of each tribe’s land?” Probably.

We finished the earlier books, with all of the monotony of the sacrifices, measurements and laws, thought we were done, now we’re back into more super-specific details. What I think when I read it is not, “now, where exactly did Dan’s eastern border stretch?” Instead, it’s that there was a tribe that descended from Dan and it did stretch from one very concrete place to another. Sometimes, we can disconnect and think this all fell out of the sky. It’s easy to forget that this all happened, and it happened in this place at this time to these people. The fact that the book through which God chose to reveal Himself includes countless human beings is extraordinary, as if we’re the medium He chooses to create His masterpiece. So, now, I really like these loooong lists and details (honestly pretty meaningless in themselves, I don’t reference a map or anything, but heavy with significance at their inclusion at all.)

The genocide is another thing altogether. It hurts to read, especially to spend even an extra second in consideration. It’s a little like reading the story of Noah, not through the tiny prism of Noah & his family, but thinking of everyone else. All other people drowned. It’s a horrific story we tell to children. Or speaking of inappropriate kids’ stories, David separates Goliath’s body from his head at the end. I have a million more examples, and 1 question, in light of the last paragraph. If these are real people, in real places, at real times, then real flesh and blood people just like you and me are dying…I guess the question is: What??? If God created us all in His image, and loves us all, then what about the Amorites and Amalekites? What about Goliath?

I just Googled “Amalekites,” and here’s what it says: “The Amalekites were a nomadic, warlike tribe in the Negev desert who served as the first and most persistent enemies of Israel in the Bible. As descendants of Esau, they attacked the Israelites after the Exodus, leading to a divine mandate for their destruction. Amalekite symbolizes absolute evil in Jewish tradition, representing irrational hatred if the Jewish people.”

Ok. That sounds like the extermination of a group of people symbolizing absolute evil representing hatred of God’s chosen people by those chosen people is something we can understand, doesn’t it? It sounds reasonable, even.

Now, I don’t mean to be contrary, but there is a strange passage in chapter 5, before the battle of Jericho. Joshua meets a figure, and in his aggression, essentially asks, “are you with us or against us?” This figure, a “Commander of the army of the LORD” answers, “Neither.” Neither??Now what? What do we do with that? Also, a lot of scholars think this figure was a pre-incarnation appearance of Jesus, who would later famously say, “Love your enemies.” We can assume He meant “the first and most persistent enemies of Israel,” the Amalekites, too.

So now I’m wondering what part we don’t understand. It seems like we are very clear on the Old Testament narrative, we understand enemies and war. Good guys and bad guys, us vs them. We do understand and we honestly don’t seem to mind those parts. The complicated parts are the ones that are complicated by this Commander and Jesus Himself. Neither? Love your enemies? Their words bother us, not the book of Joshua.

And here’s what I’ll say to that: they should. We should be bothered, and we should stay bothered. The words and way of Jesus are revolutionary and radical, we have no frame of reference for the Kingdom of God. Unconditional love and grace is not what we do here, we do productivity and record-keeping. Vengeance above forgiveness.

It’s vital to stay bothered, to keep wrestling with these parts we don’t like, that confront us in the deepest parts of us. (Of course, we do have to be aware of what actually we’re wrestling with/about.) And hidden in the middle of this story is a command for how we’re called to interact with these parts. The Commander says “Neither,” then He says, “now take off your shoes because you’re on holy ground.” That’s so good. He reminds us that when we’re in relationship with Him, it’s all holy ground, and Joshua’s reaction is to fall facedown. When we read the Word, his is the only posture that will work, awe, reverence and total respect, trying to make our lives fit Him instead of twisting Him to fit us.

Joshua IS certainly a tough book, maybe not for the reasons we think it is, but we must not stop reading it.

Everything I Need

The way that I usually read the Bible is very similar to the Bible In A Year plan. I read a few chapters of the New Testament and a few of the Old. For instance, I am currently in Galatians and Ezekiel, and I sit with my notebook and read until I don’t. It’s at least a chapter of each, but some of the chapters in, say, Isaiah or Ezekiel , are very short, so I might read several. Sometimes, the narrative makes me lose all sense of the big numbers, and in that case, it’s anyone’s guess how long I’ll read.

But lately, I’ve been taking the path specific to the “Bible In A Year,” and I find it quite similar to the Catholic Church, or mega churches, or my sister’s yoga community. When lots and lots of people are in a space, doing the same thing, at the same time, there is a certain energy, a connectedness. When Seinfeld was on, we all watched Thursdays at 9, together, separately, and then talked about it the next day. It’s powerful when thousands are all singing along with the greatest hit in an arena.

Today, the reading was in Luke, and the passage held this important proverb, from Jesus: “Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and He will give you everything you need. (Lk 12:31)”

If this were a Sunday morning, I imagine I’d spend the time discussing what “seeking” actually is. What does it mean to seek something “above all else?” And the Kingdom of God is a massive concept, which parts do we seek? All of it? What if we have different understandings of the Kingdom of God? Is the Kingdom I’m seeking the same as the Kingdom you’re seeking? Is that ok? Can we have different perspectives?

But today, I can’t seem to think about anything other than “everything you need.” What do I need? What do I need? What do I need? What do I need? What do I need?

We’d probably thing about food or or drink, first, but Jesus says not to worry or be concerned with those things. Or our clothes. He even says to sell our possessions. (Lk 12:22, 29, 33) So, what would He call needs? Because it seems like our understanding of what we need is the key to our search, doesn’t it? And I wonder if we’ve gotten that part wrong, and have been searching in the wrong places.

Then, He turns it up even further, in verse 34, “Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be.” What is my treasure? Honestly? Is it what I think it is? Does my life show what I treasure? What does my heart truly desire?

Incidentally, I’m not going to answer any of these questions here. Maybe I can’t. But, there are so many places in the Scriptures, when people ask a bunch of questions, God answers with, “Go find some people.”I imagine He’d say that to these questions, too. That’s His gift. So, today, it’s enough to know that we’re all asking these questions at the same time. It’s much more than simply enough.

Jairus

In Sunday’s service, I stated a relatively simple but heavy truth that the Church almost always grows (in both width & depth) in times of oppression…but in prosperity, not so much. This has been played out and proven over history, and probably, our own lives.

In the book of Luke (8:41-42), “a man named Jairus, a leader of the local synagogue, came and fell at Jesus’ feet, pleading with Him to come home with him. His only daughter, who was about 12 years old, was dying.”

It’s not hard to vividly picture this scene in your head. He “came and fell,” “pleading.” His daughter is dying and he’s broken-hearted and broken, he’s poor in spirit. There’s nothing left to do, so he comes to a certain Rabbi, of whom he’s heard rumors. Who knows if they’re true, but he’s at the end of his rope. Imagine his face and footsteps. I don’t think he ran – maybe he did, but the word ‘fell’ brings images of heavy feet and slumped shoulders to me, of barely getting to Jesus before collapsing under the weight of such intense loss. He pleads, begs, cries, wails. “Help her, Rabbi, please help her!!” It’s 2 verses that are absolutely, totally devastating.

Now, maybe Jairus was always following Jesus, maybe he was one of the first followers. Maybe he knew Jesus, maybe he believed. But maybe not, and that’s what I imagine. If he knew him, believed, he would have come sooner. The Jairus in my head was skeptical, fell right into line with the Jewish teachers and Pharisees in his circle. Or maybe, even, he was decidedly not a believer. Instead, maybe he thought this Rabbi was a dangerous threat to his God and his religion.

But pain and suffering, oppression, lead us into some very uncomfortable spaces, right? We say & do things we might never say & do. We’re much more open minded, less likely to close any doors, more likely to open already closed doors. Jesus is a trouble-maker, but when her daughter is dying, what if it’s true??? What can it hurt?

Jairus asks. He seeks, He knocks. He cries out in his broken-ness. And God answers. When Israel is in Egypt and cries out, God answers.

When things are great, clicking along, the bills are paid, the sun is shining, we have a great tendency to forget. When we’re being promoted at work, we think we deserve it, we’ve earned it, we’re capable and strong. We know what to do. But when we’re fired, we’re lost, afraid, weak, and have no idea what to do or where to go. When we cry out for Help, God is far more apt to rescue us, than when we think we’re in control and so awesome we could never need/use any help from anyone.

To tell you the truth, as I’m thinking about it, Levi (Matthew) is a much more exceptional story. He was a guy who had a good job, power, lots of money, and when Jesus said, “Follow me,” he left that all behind. We’re probably way more Jairus than Levi.

Today is a gorgeous day, I slept great last night, and now I feel good and got a bunch done in the yard and my closet. I ate terrific pizza with my son for lunch. The Angel will be home in a minute. Today is a very good day. And I didn’t think of God too much, today. I said Thank You a few times, fleeting and quick. Sunday, I had a headache that woke me up out of sleep in the middle of the night, ibuprofen didn’t help, it was agony, and I spent hours in prayer.

The idea is that, whether we have everything or nothing, whether it’s sunny or sleeting, whether our bank accounts are overflowing or empty, whether our hearts are overflowing or empty, God is still God and loves us exactly the same. I bet this is the “secret” Paul talked about, except it’s not really a secret at all, it’s the secret practice of turning our hearts toward Jesus not only on Saturday, when it hurts, but also on Sunday, when we’re healed.

Next Steps

I have been making some small, significant changes in my life (maybe not all so small), and it has me thinking about transformation. We discuss the art of becoming quite a bit: when it happens, how it happens, why it happens… What provides the impetus for real change in our lives?

Of course, nobody likes change. There’s that true cliche that says “Change only happens when the pain of staying the same outweighs the pain of change.” Maybe we’re there. Maybe our lives have become unmanageable and we’re suffering, or maybe we just have that nagging sense that there’s more, a new, next step we are being called into, like a splinter in our minds or an anvil on our shoulders. Pain can look very different for each of us.

It’s interesting, this transformation is not something someone else can do for us. Our people may see the reality, or the invitation, just as we might have in their lives, but the next steps (if they are to be authentic and lasting) are ones into which we can’t be coerced. Anakin Skywalker, before Darth Vader, speaking to his love, Padme, says, “Together, you and I can rule the galaxy. We can make things the way we want them to be!” This is the lie of control. Anakin believes he knows the right answers for everyone (we probably have made this assumption before, as well, right?) and should force them to make the “right” decisions. He believes he can and must decide their path, but our path is ours to take with the Spirit inside us, with Its prompting, courage, and strength.

So, what is our path? What are our next steps? Your next steps aren’t mine to take, or to direct, any more than mine are yours. Our only responsibilities are to have our eyes open, honestly, to recognize this call – both from and into – and then consider the step. (Today the step might only be to consider taking it, starting to think about starting to think about moving, or it might be to actually jump. Who knows?)

Sunday is Palm Sunday, the beginning of Holy Week, and we’ll begin a conversation about the choice the people of Jerusalem had: Pilate and the Roman Empire, OR Jesus Christ & His New Kingdom? It’s the same choice we all have, in every moment. Do we want to continue walking the way it has been, the way it is, or are we willing to join the revolution of God and enter a new creation?

What better time could there be to imagine a new world? Easter, the celebration of new life. What could our new life in Him look like? Where is He calling us, who is He calling us to become?

And I bet, like me, you’re caught in an avalanche of distraction and disturbance. The alarm bells are ringing, the wheels are shaking, every side is clamoring for your attention. It’s like how the text message notifications ring the very moment you sit down to read, or how you remember the laundry when you sit down to pray. The enemy of our transformation is often preoccupation, for whatever Very Important Reason.

How about if, this Easter season, we try to notice where we are today (yes, I know it’s hard and it might sting), and imagine where the next steps might take us? They just might take us on the ancient road to an empty tomb, where we can finally find ourselves, and the life only He can give.

[And, as always, we do this together – as says the song lyric that often closes services, “Let’s take this one step at a a time, I’ll hold your hand if you hold mine.”]

Details, pt 2

The site prompt is asking me to share about one of the best gifts I’ve ever gotten, and before we continue…well, maybe it’s not “before,” maybe it’s all related in the same conversation. Anyway. For Christmas this year, the Angel gave me 2 canvasses (canvi?) of pictures she had taken from a vacation beach trip, and on those canvi, there were words. The first one held my wedding vows to her, from May 2001 (I still have the original paper I read from at our ceremony.) Her vows, sadly, were lost in the flood that took everything else we owned. Still, that second canvas also had wedding vows, but these were newly written, from December 2025. How is that for “one of the best gifts” any human being has ever gotten??

Now, moving on. Yesterday’s post was about the details of our lives that affect the sorts of soil we are, and are becoming. Then, this morning, today’s Bible In A Year reading is in Leviticus. I recognize that nobody likes Leviticus. Many of us are commenting (more like complaining) on the endless lists of instructions at the end of Exodus, and I always want to say, “just wait til we get into Leviticus.” I’m no different, I don’t like Leviticus, BUT it also happens to be one of my new favorite books. This super boring, repetitive list of commands has a vital message for our lives, then, now, and forever.

Why are there so many instructions, why so much detail, why does this matter so much (and it obviously does), and why do these commands matter now, at all? Why are we reading this? Why should I care, thousands of years later?

We live in a world of “good enough.” The smallest amount of effort is good enough. The minimum effort necessary is fine, just get by, don’t try too hard. As even Solomon says in Ecclesiastes, “avoid all extremes.” This philosophy is the polar opposite of the people we read about in the Scriptures, who left everything behind to follow a new Way of living. Who could ever have been more extreme than Jesus?

Leviticus, and the parable of the soils, ask for our attention to who we are, who we are becoming, what we care about, and what we believe about ourselves and Our God. Essentially, (in addition to the overwhelmingly detailed sacrificial system, and the overwhelmingly detailed weights and measures of the Tabernacle in Exodus), they’re all asking what we’re giving to God. What is our offering? And, as we all know, the offering, the level of gratitude, implies a value to the gift and the Giver. Are we giving the first, the best, or simply what’s left?

The Tabernacle was the early precursor to the Temple in Jerusalem, which was the early precursor to the current Temples, which are you and me. Do you think the lengths and widths of a tent or building are somehow less important than the details of our lives? That the Temple mattered then, but not now? Judging by the Bible, the very Word of God, everything matters.

If that’s true, if 1. Everything matters, and 2. How we do anything is how we do everything, then what does that mean? If we give scraps to our job, then it’s probably not the only place we give scraps. What do our spouses, children, friends, co-workers, cashiers at the grocery store, servers, neighbors & enemies, get from us? What kind of soil are we in our home, community and the world? Do they know Who we follow?And do they know His tremendous value to us? As far as that goes, do they know their value to us?

He is never asking for perfection, just the best we have to give, in any and all situation. Our first fruits. Of course, all situations are different, what we have to give might be different from moment to moment, but way too often, we slide along, at the lowest possible plane, trying not to break a sweat.

I think Exodus, the Tabernacle, Leviticus, food & sacrificial laws, the canvi from the Angel, our posture towards each other, the way we express our love (intentionally and without condition or limit), Saturday nights and Tuesday mornings, all testify to the Truth that scraps are not, and have never been, what we’ve been called into. There is an honor and dignity to this awesome experience of being human, and some things, like the scraps, the crumbs that fall from our table, are simply beneath us. Sometimes, the biggest, most significant changes begin with small, seemingly inconsequential acts. Sometimes, an empty tomb and a brand new creation begin with a baby in a barn.

Yesterdays

Today is Monday, and yesterday, we studied a passage in Ecclesiastes that carried some really massive ideas. And those ideas asked some questions that we usually try our hardest to avoid. Obviously, Great Big Ideas with questions like sledgehammers aren’t reserved for Sundays, or for just yesterday. They can come & break the door down any of our yesterdays, if only we are open to receive – or as the Bible says, if we only have “ears to hear.”

Maybe we can talk politics and what it means to respect the authorities…or maybe we can talk about the times to not do that…maybe we can wonder if it’s principle or rebellion that drives us, or what our hearts are overflowing with, flowing out into the world, getting all over everyone and everything… But I don’t really want to, not here, not today.

What I do want to talk about, here, today, is about the 2 Gospels/gospels that are constantly vying for those same hearts. Because, probably, the one we choose dictates what actually overflows, what we are giving, what frequency we are emitting.

The first is the Gospel of Jesus Christ. This is one of grace, forgiveness, kindness, goodness, gentleness, humility, faithfulness, that has one central tenet: love. Namaste means the image of the Divine in me sees and affirms and honors the image of the Divine in you. We see we are all made in the image of God, all fallen, all redeemed by His grace and love alone. (Of course, for as long as we need to, we can choose to not accept this gift.) We see each other as brothers and sisters, free of judgment and hate. We’re not all stepping on each other for a bigger piece of the pie – we recognize we don’t deserve any of the pie, and yet, His abundance is infinite, which means we can all have all the pie we want. Our winning isn’t based one another’s loss, we all win. We are grateful.

The gospel of me says that I am the center, I am better than you, my opinions, wants, & needs, are the primary concern for everyone. I demand assent. Maybe I will love you, if I want to, if there’s something in it for me. The divine in me sees you. The basic tenets are comfortability, pleasure, ease, temporal happiness (mine, not yours, unless yours happens to coincide with mine.) All of the -isms (racism, sexism, etc) exist here, because they all are based in the core belief: I am better than you. [We don’t acknowledge that this gospel is tied together with a dangerously thin line, because this arrogance is only superficial. It’s not grounded in confidence or esteem, it is insecure, fearful, overwhelmed with its own inadequacy. This is why, with this gospel’s worldview, I am so myopic – I worship a very small god. And I am mean & angry. I am very very angry.]

The very interesting thing about all of this, is that we have a choice. Deuteronomy says, “I set before you life or death, blessing or curse. Choose life.” Some see God as like the ocean we swim in, but I think this verse exposes the flaw in that metaphor. You see, the ocean doesn’t care if you drown, not even a little bit. It’s completely indifferent to your survival, much less your fulfillment or joy. With those 2 words: “Choose Life,” this God shows His heart. He wants us to swim. But we can, and do, choose…

We decide a million times a day, in every moment, which Gospel/gospel we choose – the Gospel of Jesus Christ or the gospel of me. The part that I don’t always like to admit is that we display that choice with our faces, words, posts, and lives, no matter what we might call it. Everybody can tell, usually the only one we’re fooling is ourselves.

So, what could it look like if we all swim? If we all chose to love each other, no matter what? If we chose to honor each other, and if we all just ate all the pie we ever wanted, at the same table, together? I’d really love to find out. I’ll go first.

Thinking About You

I don’t always sleep great, and sometimes, that leaves me watching documentaries in the middle of the night. Last night/this morning, I watched one on Amazon called The Hobby: Tales From The Tabletop, about the subculture of people who play modern board games. I say modern, because it wasn’t about Monopoly or Operation, the new games are strategic and complicated, with pages & pages of instructions. They’re more D & D than Scrabble, more Call of Duty than Pac-Man. It was terrific, I love stories that are so quintessentially human.

And it made me think of the Bridge.

Last night, at Open Door (the church’s prayer ministry/group/meeting), we sat and talked, laughed, openly shared our circles, the people that mean so much to us, and what we/they are going through. The things we talk about are, in turns, heartbreaking and joyful. The only requisites are honesty and vulnerability.

Just before that, I sat in a men’s group. Earlier in the day, I spoke to my sister in the parking lot of the tapioca shop near my house – 2 things I do every Tuesday. I know the cashier’s names and they know mine. The day before, I had a 2 hour lunch with a friend I have known since we were born. After the documentary this morning, after the Angel left for work, I went to the gym. Tonight, I’ll go to a college basketball game. But before that, we’ll meet one of the Angel’s closest friends (when I think & talk about how much she’s brought into my life, these people are near the top) for dinner. Every single one of these things have an activity in their center, but the activity is completely superfluous. It’s the who that matters far more than the what.

I often reference a passage about the prophet Elijah. He’s alone, broken, and crying out to God, Who doesn’t answer any of his questions. Not one. But what He does do is point Elijah to town, where he can find some buddies. When I first read it, it sounded like God was profoundly misunderstanding what Elijah needed, maybe being intentionally unhelpful. But now, I see. The only one who was misunderstanding Elijah’s needs was Elijah. God created Elijah (and you and me and our neighbors and everybody,m everywhere, forever) and knew perfectly well how much he needed people to play board games with him.

How many years have I wasted allowing friendships to fade, not returning phone calls and not reaching out? How many times have I cancelled meetings and missed moments, simply because I forgot (or ignored) what my heart & soul were obviously seeking, what gifts & opportunities God was very obviously providing? How many tears have I cried, desperately needing comfort and connection, but always pridefully crying alone? And how about the wonderful things I kept to myself, about to burst?

So, this is why I thought about the Bridge. I see we’ve been building a great big beautiful ball of knotted yarn, where it’s impossible to tell where you stop and I begin. Now, my celebrations and sufferings are yours, yours are mine. We are a family, with all the love and complexities that families carry. We are the living, breathing illustration of God’s love, wisdom, grace and mercy towards Elijah. We are the small, humble question and His answer, the call and His gift.

Maybe God will answer all of our prayers in exactly the way we want, the way we ask them at Open Door. To one situation, I said, “well, that’s what I want and that’s what I’m asking for,” and we all laughed. But who knows, maybe the answer will be “Yes.” But it’s hardly the point, in sort of the same way the lunch and tapioca and basketball aren’t the point. (Our prayers are closer to the point than the tapioca, but the gift is never more important than the Gift-Giver, the One we pray to is always more important than the prayer.) He’s already answered all of the deepest prayers we too often leave unasked, He’s answered them with each other, with people to love and be loved by, with His love & redemption, with new life.

So, I watched this cool, weird documentary thinking of you, my community, my family…I am overwhelmed with gratitude, and I just wanted you to know.

Peace

It’s an interesting dilemma that I’m faced with, right now. I want to write and post, I want to connect with you, but at the same time, I want us all to be as far away from our computers and phones as we possibly can. But you know what? Sometimes, this is what we have, so we’ll take it with joy and gratitude.

We have a Christmas Eve service at 7pm on Christmas Eve.

Last night, I live-streamed the first part of the Christmas message (on YouTube, The Bridge Faith Community), and I even got to say, “smash that like button.” It was called 1,000 questions and 1 Mind. I’ve been leaning into the questions we might have about this season, this holiday, why we do what we do, and what it means. They’re the questions that we all have but might be a little too self-conscious to ask and/or explore. We sound uninformed to ask, “why?” and it sounds silly to ask why these trees are in our house, and why we chose December 25th. And, especially, it sounds bad to say, “why do I care about this?” doesn’t it? But, we’ve probably all thought all of these, at one time or another, so I’ll say them for us. We’ll answer those 1,000 questions, and you’re welcome – more than welcome, you’ll be accepted and you’ll be loved – to come and celebrate with us.

At the end of the message, I spent a few minutes talking about the idea that has been weighing heavily on my heart. If we are called to be peacemakers, then why are we choosing so often to not make peace? For whatever reason, we have some broken relationships, some unresolved issues, some places where we have not forgiven, not given grace, places where we have not loved. And these things are magnified around the holidays (especially this one.) One of the lessons we can learn from the incarnation, His coming to be “with us,” is the imperative for those of us who would follow Him, to also go first.

Go first? At what? Yes. Anything. Everything. Pick up a phone. Say sorry. Say I love you. Extend your hand, your arms, your heart.

There’s a tv commercial for Uber that makes me feel so silly and so soft. The idea is that a girl and her father left on terrible terms, we see clips of this conflict, hear his phone call to apologize (sort of), and the through thread is the girl riding in her Uber to go home. When they see each other, they embrace and I’m not sure what happens after that, because I’m crying by then. But who goes first, here? Both. He calls. She gets in a car to see him.

Where can we go first? Maybe we could look for spaces where we can bridge gaps? Maybe this Christmas, Jesus wouldn’t be the only one in pursuit of the ones He loves so desperately? (And just to be clear, “the ones He loves so desperately” are you and me and your neighbor and the cashiers at the Walmart…well, rather than type everybody I can think of, it’s everyone. Everyone, every single one, are the ones He loves so desperately. There’s no one that isn’t.)

So, I’ll see you tomorrow evening, unless you’re making peace or smashing all of the obstacles that divide. In that case, I’ll see you when you’re finished. Merry Christmas!