A Consistent Relationship

I signed up for a list to get emails from a woman named Kristin Hanggi. She’s an artist and a creativity ‘coach,’ offering workshops, advice, and general positive vibes. A few weeks ago she addressed something we talk about often, whether she knows she is talking about faith communities and discipleship is questionable. It doesn’t matter too much, though, does it?

She writes, “The most important part of birthing a new idea is creating a consistent relationship with it. We show up day-after-day-after-day, and being a part of a supportive community can give us the encouragement and tenacity to go the distance. Something happens in our consistency and showing up. We start to learn that we are trustable. We start to believe in ourselves. We start to develop a relationship with our powerful inner voice.”

Probably the most important part of anything worthwhile (whether it is a new idea, marriage, work of art, deadlift, whatever) is creating a consistent relationship with it. How can we expect to grow or connect or explore something without showing up? I remember speaking with a good friend 15ish years ago and he said our church at the time was clique-y, that it was very hard to “break into” (his words). I disagreed, figuring it’s actually quite easy, but significantly more difficult when you only show up every couple of months. That’s only become more evident with time and experience.

Obviously the prototype for a supportive community is a church.

The BIG thing that happens in consistency and showing up is intimacy. We know and are known. If either of those are missing, so is the intimacy. That’s why we talk so much about the destructive nature of hiding, of hypocrisy, of pretending. Actual relationship is impossible without authenticity or without presence. It’s impossible to build trust when we’re not physically, emotionally, spiritually there. It’s also impossible to build trust when we’re there, but in disguise.

She mentions trusting ourselves, believing in ourselves and developing relationship with our inner voice. The command is to love others as we love ourselves, but we very rarely love ourselves well, so what does that say about our ability to love another?

Then, in the email today from Ms. Hanggi, she speaks of 5 things every human being needs (an idea from author David Richo), and 1 in particular: Allowing. “How can I freely allow the idea to be what it is, as opposed to my idea of what it needs to be?” I think I’d paraphrase that as “How can I freely allow myself to be who I am, as opposed to my idea of who I need to be (should) be?” No kidding! The mountain of should’s that crush us daily keeps us from loving us, loving each other, telling the truth, and showing up to the sort of community that picks us up, sustains us, and moves us forward.

Now. That’s helpful, but none of it is exactly the point I’d like to make. Kristin Hanggi is a writer/director/podcaster/creative person in Los Angeles. I’m pretty sure she is a Jesus follower, but she is not what one would call a “Christian” artist. St. Augustine famously said, “All truth is God’s truth,” and it is not even a little surprising that Jesus would be found in a ‘secular’ mass email, or a blockbuster, or a pop song, or scientific theory, or in a Netflix documentary, or my neighbor down the street. If it’s true – and I’m not saying everything is truth, of course, some things are quite the opposite, but if it is true… – it is from God, because all truth is His.

Instead of making our world smaller and smaller, only acknowledging certain labels and genres, placing boundaries where none exist, maybe we could hold hands with the Spirit as She trains our eyes to spot Jesus, opening our eyes and minds to the overwhelming, limitless beauty of Love, the Gospel, and the One who made it all.

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